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Everyday
Tips
for Preventing Child Abuse: |
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Conflict resolution and
Stress Management:
Using your head
instead of your hands. |
Using your head instead of your hands will keep you from hurting someone, especially your children, or from getting hurt yourself. Controlling your temper isn't always easy, but it works out better for everyone in the end.
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Stop and think--avoid making hasty, angry comments or actions. Don't lose control!
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Actively listen to what the other person is saying. Try to understand their point of view rather than thinking about what you're going to say next.
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Communicate clearly, but respectfully.
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Walk away when you're too angry to be reasonable. Cool down and then try talking with you're calmer.
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Move away quickly if someone has a weapon or has been using alcohol or drugs. You can't reason with someone who isn't thinking clearly.
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Recognize your own trigger words or actions that provoke an emotional response. You will be better able to control your actions and emotions when you know what sets you off.
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Define the problem and state your needs. Talk about issues rather than insulting or blaming the other person.
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After figuring out what both parties need, try to come to a mutually satisfying solution--it's give and take.
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Be flexible and open-minded. Brainstorm on all options to resolve the conflict rather than just your own.
Coping with stress--when every day pressure builds up, try these alternatives:
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Take a deep breath or two. . . or three.
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Walk away and take a break--get some fresh air if someone can watch your child.
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Pretend you are hearing what your child is about to hear before you say it.
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Call a friend and vent to help you calm down.
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Splash some water on your face or take a hot shower to relax your mind.
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Put on some soothing music.
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Put your child in a time-out chair (one minute for each year of age is a good guide).
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Put yourself in a time-out chair -- think about why you are angry with your child.
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Sit down and write as many helpful words as you can think of. . .save it to review later.
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Remember: YOU are the adult.